God has faithfully purged from the pit of my soul, those things that put me on a 40 year search for the love of God that was there all along.
My name is Debbie. I turned 57 years old in October, 2011. I came to Teen Challenge from Florida when I was 55. God has saved my life and changed me forever as I have learned to trust Him and commit my life to Him.
I came to the Montana Women's Outreach in October, 2009. I have been here for a little over two years and will complete the Teen Challenge Ministry Institute (TCMI) in January 2012.
I was born to an alcoholic, drug-addicted mother who had given eight of her nine children up for adoption. As an infant, I was adopted by some folks who were severe alcoholics my mother met in the bar. My whole childhood consisted of severe abuse and rejection. I started getting high and drinking at sixteen. I have suffered every aspect of drug addiction and the avenues that it will take you down, in its worst form, for forty years. That is a lifetime of addiction for me. I suffered a severe sexual assault and physical assault in July 2008. My facial structure was destroyed with one blow to the face.
How did I get to this point at fifty-five years of age? Looking at the length of time and the amount of drugs abuse and physical abuse I suffered, something was terribly wrong. My way of life became a twisted form of existing. When running that hard, you do not make sound choices in life. Throughout the years, my life became unbearable. I went to counseling, I went to treatment, and nothing worked. I spent most of my life waitressing and in the bars and taking what life offered at every moment. What I got was much frustration and an empty place in my soul only God could fill.
When I was twenty-five, I received Jesus into my heart, and I became born again. However, throughout the years, even though I was faithful to church, I never established a relationship with my Lord. Unless you seek Him with your whole heart, you will not become rooted and grounded in Christ. If that does not happen, you will not live a successful Christian life. While running from myself and my drug abuse, my life took a downward spiral and my addictions ran deeper as my three children grew up. Although God is working in my life and restoring my relationship with my children, there are still some things that will take time and forgiveness on both sides to resolve. I have seen much improvement already.
I went to jail, attempted suicide, and was hopeless.I knew that at this time of my life, something had to change. I tried harder than I ever had to do the right thing.When some Godly mentors asked if I wanted to come to Teen Challenge, I was hesitant, but said that I would pray about it. God provided a way for me to come. He was honoring my diligence. When you seek Him, you will find Him. Satan wanted my life. I knew deep in the pit of my soul that my chances of survival were running out. Having the knowledge of God and continuing in sin is very dangerous spiritually. I became very diligent. Sin is progressive, and the end result is death. When we come to the end of ourselves and are broken, then God will save us.
The assault I suffered was my brokenness. As I cried out to God, He brought me to Montana Women's Outreach and the transformation has been amazing! I have learned to forgive those who hurt me, let God have hatred and resentment that I harbored in my heart, and received forgiveness for the many things that I have done in my life. Without a change of heart, everything will remain the same. Learning to establish a daily relationship with Him, I let God love me and have my heart! He has brought me to a new place with Him! I am thankful for Godly mentors here at Teen Challenge that I could trust with my heart and heal. I am grateful to God and I am now dedicating my life to helping other women with life controlling issues and abuse. I plan to continue my education. Teen Challenge helped me see why I made all those bad decisions, and what I was running from all of that time. I am very hopeful about my future in Christ. I knew early on in my recovery that I wanted to go to TCMI to train and help others.
Do you know someone with a life-controlling issue?